An elderly couple in Chennai, who are in their 90s, are setting an example of inclusivity and acceptance for the rest of the nation, by adopting a trans couple. 93-year-old Shamsher and her 95-year-old husband, advocate Mr. Darbara Singh Chahal, recently opened their doors and hearts by adopting a third daughter, Dhananjay and her partner Rudra Pratam Singh, who’s a trans man.
Dhananjay, a trans woman finally found a place she can call her home and people she can call hers after years of being subjected to isolation, humiliation and discrimination. The elderly couple in their 90s reside in the Sector 30 of Chandigarh and their story is making the rounds of internet.
A transgender activist herself, Dhananjay Chauhan was quoted in a media report saying a brief but astute statement – “Log alag ko galat samajhte hain… Badlaav aayega..but 100 saal aur lagenge (People consider different to be wrong. Change will come, but it will take hundred more years)”.
The Facts of the Matter
In 2014, the Indian Supreme Court made a landmark judgement in which members of transgender community were declared as the “third gender”. Seven years later, and transgenders are still subjected to humiliation, discrimination and isolation. Reports of a transgender person being assaulted for their gender are as common as they come. The worst part? These reports are made fun of transgenders continue to face brunt of a discriminative society.
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Meet Mrs. And Mr. Chahal – The Torchbearers of Change
However, an elderly couple in Chandigarh have become the new torchbearers of change. Advocate Mr. Darbara Singh Chahal, and his wife Shamsher, have opened their hearts and their doors for a trans couple. They recently adopted their third daughter, Dhananjay Singh, a trans woman, and welcomed her partner Rudra Pratap Singh to their hope.
“Dua mein hume koi nahi maangta”: Transgender activist Dhananjay Singh
A transgender rights activist herself, Dhananjay Singh is also the first transgender student in Punjab University. Speaking about the trials and tribulations she and members of her community face, she in an India Times interview said, “While we, as kinnars, are seen as someone who can give them ‘dua,’ they don’t believe in respecting us. They demand ‘dua’ from us but dua mein hume koi nahi maangta (we are not sought in blessings).”
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The Everyday Trials Faced by Transgenders
“Parents bhi nikaal dete hain – people suggest conversion therapy. Imagine, there is still no ban on conversion therapy in India. When we enter a restaurant or a showroom, people see us and assume we are beggars and mistreat us thinking we won’t even pay after using their services or eating their food,” she further added.
How Mrs. and Mr. Chahal Adopted Their Third Daughter?
The tale of Mrs. and Mr. Chahal adopting Dhananjay is a tale of serendipity, faith and compassion. The nonagenarian couple were given the idea to adopt by their two daughters Samira Kosar and Dr. Mamta Chahal. While Samira is a Katahak expert, Mamta is a gynecologist based in America.
Talking about her tale of getting adopted, Dhananjay told IndiaTimes how she reconnected to Samira Kosar who used to teach her kathak when she was a boy. Back when she reconnected with Samira, she used to beg and lived in a slum with her partner Rudra Pratap Singh.
“Everything Kept Falling into Place..”
After reconnecting, Samira invited Dhananjay to her home and heard how her life changed for worse when she accepted her gender. “She shared my life’s story with her parents. Samira didi and her sister Mamta, who lives in the US, inspired their parents to adopt us. Everything kept falling into place, and here we are, living with my parents”, she was quoted saying.
Theirs is a beautiful story of acceptance, love and a dash of serendipity. We at Shiksha News extend our best wishes to the Chahal family, and wish that the country produces more Mrs. and Mr. Chahal.
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